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Living with Grief

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How we remember

“In the end, we remember people in pieces — slivers of memory, images, bursts of sound, and trails of whispers.” -Patti Davis, Floating in the Deep End: How Caregivers Can…

Loss & beauty

As my parents were dying, I developed a fascination with birds. I started purchasing feeders and bird baths, researching the best seeds. I kept the birdbaths fresh and feeders full…

Am I going backwards?

In A Grief Observed, the journal C.S. Lewis kept after his wife died, he described the circular nature of loss, “For in grief nothing ‘stays put.’ One keeps on emerging…

The laziness of grief

“And no one ever told me about the laziness of grief. Except at my job — where the machine seems to run on much as usual — I loathe the…

Regrets & finding peace

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”   – Soren Kierkegaard, paraphrased from “Journals and Papers 1843” In grief – and in life – love often…

Mapping our grief

If you were to make a map of your own grief, what would it look like? I think of grief as a country that few would choose to visit, let alone…

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Play your grief card

A grieving mother once shared with me that she was shocked at how insensitive others were, how they kept forgetting…

Making space for grief

I once knew a woman whose son had died. Her grief was profound and unpredictable, and she was often caught…

Hope for the new year

When you have experienced a loss, the whole world can feel different. Even the new year can feel strange. While…

Grief and the holidays

‘Tis the season of twinkling lights, holiday cheer, and frenzied shopping. But it is also a time of gathering darkness,…

Grief and gratitude

Here in the Midwest, the trees have shed their leaves as long dark nights give way to frosty mornings. Soon,…

Living in the gap

Fall is upon us. The trees are dropping their leaves, giving way to bare branches, cool nights and shorter days.…

You are not alone

“The act of living is different all through,” C.S. Lewis wrote in the book, A Grief Observed. Lewis was reflecting…

Navigating the holidays

December is upon us, with the twinkling lights, the rush of shopping and the holiday gatherings. This time of year…